The White House is fractured. While Obama hopes to exit the Oval Office without any mention of Nibiru tarnishing his presidential legacy, opposition within his fragmented administration is urging the president to make a public announcement –defying an agreement with Vladimir Putin—in case Nibiru becomes visible to the world before he vacates office.

Our confidential source, a Washington insider with ties to the current administration, defines the current atmosphere in the White House as “a chaotic mess.” A splinter group, our source said, defied presidential policy and leaked information about the dark star to the press; on Wednesday, White House Office of Science and Technology Director John Holdren further distanced himself from Obama’s inner circle by acknowledging that the Earth remains vulnerable to interplanetary disasters. Although he failed to mention the word Nibiru—that could explain why he was not terminated or disappeared—Holdren said: “We’re not prepared. We have to be smarter than the dinosaurs. If we are to be a capable civilization as technology allows, we need to be prepared for rare events, because they can do a lot of damage to the Earth.”

Holdren, along with other dissident elements, are taking advantage of Obama’s absence. “Obama is out busy campaigning for his preferred successor, Hilary Clinton. At the moment he is an absentee president,” our source said. “There are people within the administration and the space agency who believe disclosure about Nibiru is needed, and in their own way attempt to get information out without speaking too candid about the topic. Holdren is aware of the threat. He is a family man. But I’m certain he also fears for himself and his loved ones. Defying the president is not without consequence.”

Many believe the president holds no real power, and is a puppet manipulated by secret groups like The Illuminati, the Bilderbergs, or Majestic 12. These groups may exist and exert influence over presidential policy, but do not dictate day-to-day operations inside the White House. That job belongs to three women; Susan Rice, Victoria Nuland, and Samantha Powers, collectively known as “The Washington Furies.” They subjugate the president, and are the true policy makers of the administration.  Earlier this year, Obama appointed Nuland as Nibiru Czar, at her insistence.

“These women hold immense power,” our source said. “They have twisted the president’s arm and are the primary reason he has not gone public about Nibiru.”

The Furies insulate Obama from the pressure of outside influence.  They want to ensure future history texts paint a favorable portrait of their president. If he were to make a Nibiru disclosure and Nibiru failed to light the skies by year’s end, the Furies fear that Obama’s already crippled reputation would plummet into an unrecoverable tailspin.

On the other hand, men like Holdren have begged Obama to go public while there is still time.

“This cabal of disclosure proponents wholeheartedly believe disclosure is necessary, not only for the president’s sake, but for all mankind,” our source said. “The president’s strings are being tugged in every direction.”

Regardless of his decision, a myriad of believers from all walks of life give credence to the Nibiru cataclysm; conspiracy theorists, politicians, scientific experts, Nibiruoligists, and whistle-blowers believe the dark star is on its way to wreak havoc upon the earth, with some anticipating its arrival by Christmas this year.

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The White House and the Kremlin are not the only political institutions currently debating whether a Nibiru disclosure would help or hinder humanity’s future. The race to be the next Secretary General of the United Nations remains wide open; with world leaders gathering in New York ahead of the general

assembly, the talk of the town is who will be the next person given the weighty task of leading the United Nations into the future. Nine candidates remain—three have “withdrawn” from running for reasons the mainstream media has refused to acknowledge. These three candidates—Vesna Pusic of Croatia, Igor Luksic of Montenegro, and Christiana Figueres of Costa Rica, have acknowledged Nibiru’s existence and have secretly supported a worldwide Nibiru disclosure.

Our New York source, a former diplomatic attaché to Ban Ki-moon, paints a sinister picture of the

underhanded dealings deep within the bowls of 760 United Nations Plaza. Contrary to official statements that Pusic, Luksic, and Figueres voluntarily recused themselves from consideration, our source provides shocking information proving they were forced from the race.

“This is very disturbing,” our source said. “These people were anxious to run, all seeking the position of Secretary General. They did not simply choose to withdraw—they were threatened and bullied because they publicly acknowledged that our planet is in danger from Nibiru. There may be others still running who share these views—it will be interesting to see who else drops out for reasons unknown.”

Our source said that Vena Pusic was a favored candidate; she could have been the first woman to achieve the position of Secretary General. But “the opposition” dug deep into her past and discovered that in 2012–when Pusic was Minister of European Affairs of Croatia—she mistakenly received a “Top Secret” briefing document detailing Nibiru’s existence and projected impact on our planet. Ever since, she has clandestinely campaigned for full disclosure, using her political resources to support private research and give amnesty to whistle-blowers.

“She is a brave, remarkable woman,” our source said. “Many were amazed she even risked entering the race, and then became a favorite. But she should have known the opposition would uproot her stance on Nibiru, and use it against her.”

Although the United Nations is comprised of 193 member states, only a few nations—The United States, Germany, Japan, and the United Kingdom—influence policy and procedure, and these nations have waged a thirty-year-long war against any individual or government seeking to warn the world about Nibiru.

“The United Nations is not beyond reproach. It gives the false impression that bodies representing most of the free world decide important matters with worldwide implications. This is simply not true. As always, Washington reigns supreme. Rest assured, influential parties within the White House, if not Obama himself, made sure she dropped out. What other choice did she have, I mean…If someone threatened to shoot your dog, what would you do?”

Luksic and Figueres apparently befell a similar fate. They, too, possessed taboo information about the dark star and its orbiting planets, and had favored disclosure over secrecy. Like Pusic, they cited obscure personal reasons for leaving the embattled race. Prior to pulling out, Pucsic made an ominous comment suggesting the victor had already been chosen. “It is all for show now,” Pucsic said. “If Obama wants to be the next Secretary General, nothing will stop him.”

Other outlets have echoed Pusic’s thoughts: even the Washington Post acknowledged that Obama has his eye on the prize at the United Nations.

“If Obama becomes the next Secretary General, he will have much power,” our source said. “And he will undoubtedly continue working to conceal Nibiru from the public.”

On the other side of the world, Russian President Vladimir Putin chimed in, lambasting the United Nations for perpetuating a cover-up with global implications. A spokesperson for President Putin released the following statement: “President Putin opposes all efforts to obfuscate the truth about Nibiru. President Putin has been in favor of disclosure though western powers have always hindered Russian efforts to bring this topic to the public. President Putin continues his efforts to promote disclosure on these Nibiru. President Putin expects Donald J. Trump to hold up his end of the agreement. If he does not, President Putin will do what President Putin will do.”

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In July, we printed a story that demonstrably proves that Kim Jong-un, North Korea’s maniacal leader, plans to launch nuclear weapons at Nibiru. However, a vital questione remained unanswered: How could North Korea, with its primitive nuclear technology, hope to successfully destroy or divert Nibiru, which, according to the scientific community’s brightest minds, is not a solitary object but a solar system consisting of a brown dwarf star and seven orbiting planets. Our Russian source, a former KGB and GRU agent named Strelnikov Isaak Stepanovich, working in conjunction with his North Korean associate, dug deep into the bowls of Moscow and Pyongyang. He uncovered alarming information hinting at a potential alliance between Russia and North Korea–a collaborative effort to eliminate the Nibiru threat.

Stepanovich’s research shows that Russia, fearful that North Korea’s proprietary nuclear warheads may simply blow up on the launch pad or tumble back to earth, opted to assist North Korea rather than risk nuclear Armageddon ahead of Nibiru’s  expected arrival date.

“President Putin find out that crazy Kim Jong-un planning to attack Nibiru sooner than later,” Stepanovich said. “He is determined, but a madman. Insane with desire to beat Nibiru. He crazy, even crazier than that Hillary Clinton lady. He ready his nukes to strike Nibiru…a plan that most certainly would fail. President Putin had to act. Crazy Jong-un watch YouTube video saying that if you point ICBM at Nibiru, they will automatically home in on Nibiru and drift toward it once rocket fuel expended.”

Stepanovich makes valid points. North Korea’s most sophisticated launch vehicle–the wasong-10–has a maximum effective range of 4,000 km, hardly capable of breaching the mesosphere let alone striking the Nibiru system, currently swinging around the dark side of the sun at an estimated ninety-six million miles from Earth. The United States and Russia previously warned Jong-un to not attack Nibiru, but he has defied all warnings and seems determined to eliminate or divert the dark star before it imperils the Earth. For that reason, Stepanovich said, Putin intervened and made a shocking proposal to the DPRK’s tyrannical leader. If all information is accurate, Russian President Vladimir Putin defied a directive from Washington and promised to assist Kim Jong-un, rather than thwart his plan to assault Nibiru. Russia conditionally agreed to furnish North Korea with groundbreaking technology, including enhanced telemetry guidance systems, launch vehicles, and a dozen RT-2PM Topol intercontinental ballistic missiles, Russia’s most advanced nuclear platform.

“Russia not just giving these away,” Stepanovich said. “Russia provide weapons under very strict conditions. Along with weapon, Putin send team of two hundred and fifty advisers and technicians, led by the esteemed Tomosky Orlov, chief Russian scientist, to oversee operation. There much concern that crazy Jong-un might decide to forget about Nibiru and use weapons to strike Washington–so Putin smart and make safeguards. Putin initially think Jong-un might murder Russian advisers and use missiles for another agenda, so each missile has microchip. If missile used for anything but Nibiru, the warhead will fuse and be rendered inoperative. In addition, Russian advisers must check in with Moscow every twelve hours.”

Stepanovich says the operation has been in development for several weeks. Satellite imagery, obtained via the Freedom of Information Act, shows the launch vehicles being erected on Baekdu Mountain, North Korea’s highest elevation at just over 9,000ft.  This location was chosen because Kim Jong-un wants to launch the weapons as close as possible to Nibiru, giving him the greatest chance of success.

“Putin tell him to construct launch facility in secret location,” Stepanovich said. “But lunatic Jong-un think he will miss Nibiru if missiles not fired from mountain top.”

Additionally, unconfirmed reports suggest that the ICBMs have been retrofitted to accommodate a human passenger for the one-way trip to Nibiru, and that Kim Jong-un has personally chosen twelve “volunteers,” including his sister and his mother, to guide the missiles during the final approach to Nibiru.

“This is something I heard but have not seen,” Stepanovich said. “What kind of man send his mother on suicide mission to Nibiru? This man is crazy. Putin know he is crazy. President Putin not even think this plan work, but would rather crazy leader use proven nuclear technology instead of possibly destroying planet with his own failed technology.”

Regardless of the outcome, one thing seems certain: Nibiru is in our neighborhood, and it’s getting closer.

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It has been an interesting week for the pseudo-science and quasi-astronomical communities. Armchair astronomers predicted that on September 23rd an asteroid would strike Earth with the force of ten thousand nuclear weapons. Of course, the planet remains intact, and no asteroid leveled the precious word on which we live. However, Earth remains in grave danger, and the greatest crisis humankind has ever faced looms ahead in the not so distant future. The coordinates for the Nibiru system—a brown dwarf star and seven orbiting planets—have been revealed and confirmed. This space-born menace, which imperils the Earth every 3600 years, is currently swinging around the dark side of the sun; it has obtained breakaway speed and is hurtling toward our inner solar system at approximately 27,600 miles per hour. Gravitational eddies might slow it down or speed it up, but Nibiru is rapidly moving toward our beloved world.

For over three decades, the government has cajoled and extorted the mainstream media into concealing a threat that even the craven human being can ill afford to ignore. Despite the government’s war against whistle-blowers, the location of the Nibiru star system and its viewing coordinates are now public knowledge, thanks in part to a dedicated team of truth-seekers working in conjunction with ostracized NASA scientists.

A seminal force in the astronomical community has emerged from the shadows and broken silence to confirm what Nibiru researchers have long suspected: the dark star is in our neighborhood, and it’s getting closer each day.

Dr. Ronald Shimschuck, a former NASA scientist and M.I.T. graduate, has risen from the grave of scientific obscurity to provide alarming information regarding the Nibiru star system. Earlier this year, this website conducted several interviews with Dr. Shimschuck, many of which were circulated across websites across the scientific and political spectrum.. Unfortunately, Dr. Shimschuck’s life took a tragic twist. The powers that be got to him; he was subdued and abducted during a scheduled interview with YouTube truth-seeker Steve Olson. Speculation on Dr. Shimschuck’s fate ran wild across the blogosphere, with many people assuming he had been captured or killed. Until the other day, we, too, assumed the worst—even though a website titled drshimschuck.com mysteriously appeared days after his disappearance in May. A few days ago, Dr. Ronald Shimschuck reached out to Someonesbones, eager to provide information that might preserve human life. He declined to provide details on his abduction or subsequent escape, but wanted to speak about Nibiru’s arrival.

“First, I must state that the website drshimschuck.com is not mine, nor do I employ anyone to post on my behalf. As you have guessed, I think the CIA or NSA to discredit my good name created this website. That is not why I have chosen to talk. There is important information the public needs to know about the Nibiru system. Time is short, the time is now,” Dr. Ronald Shimschuck said. “No, no, I will not talk about the events that lead to my kidnapping in Tbilisi. That is no longer important. What is important is that Nibiru is near and people have the right to know. Yes, I think they have the right to know.It would better, much better. I have seen the leaked coordinates, and I can say with some certainty that they are accurate.”

A few days ago, coordinates for the elusive Nibiru system appeared on the internet, initially released by unknown parties in a complex, quadrilatic code. A hacker group identifying itself as “NIB25X” deciphered the code and posted Nibiru’s present location to social media sites.

Dr. Ronald Shimschuck spotted the coordinates on social media and declared them to be authentic.  “When I saw the decoded coordinates, I knew someone had stumbled onto something…something dangerous,” Dr. Shimschuck said. “Whoever leaked this information did so at great peril. Revealing the location of Nibiru was an act of sheer bravery. How they got this information, I do not know. But the coordinates very closely match a predicted flight path I saw at NASA. Additionally, I noticed the posts quickly disappearing from forums and discussion groups. The government must have quickly realized what had been leaked, and was desperate to stop it.”

But the government and its sinister associates acted too late; within hours, the coordinates spread like wildfire on the information super highway. Across the ocean, other governments heralded the disclosure. Russian Ambassador to the United States Vitaly Churkin called the event a “pivotal moment in history.”

“I am surprised Obama did not use the internet kill switch,” Dr. Shimschuck said. “When additional evidence surfaced the following day, it was too late for them.”

That additional evidence substantiated the previously posted coordinates: Google maintains an application called Google Sky, a program that allows users to view computerized images obtained from NASA satellites, the Sloan Digital Sky Survey, and the Hubble Telescope. A series of grid squares map out the known universe. In early 2012, radical astronomers and Nibiru researchers accused Google of manipulating the application to conceal Nibiru’s known location.  Google—an arm of the Obama administration—accomplished this by “blacking out” grid squares. Google denied the allegations, citing technical issues as to why certain areas of the sky could not be viewed.

Last week, however, a suspected hack uncovered the grid square of Nibiru’s alleged present position, revealing a winged planet, surrounded by iron oxide dust, exacted as depicted by Sumerian scholars and Zecharia Sitchin. The image bore a striking resemblance to photographs leaked by “NibiruShock” in 2010.

“This is the Nibiru system,” said Dr. Shimschuck. “The Earth is in peril.”

The current coordinates are 5 h 42m 21.0s 22° 36′ 45.7″

Dr. Shimschuck says one still needs optimum viewing conditions and sensitive astronomical equipment to properly see the Nibiru system, but within time the essence of Nibiru will be visible to anyone with a good pair of binoculars.

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Donald J. Trump should have aced the first presidential debate against Hillary Clinton. Had he stuck to his talking points, and heeded the advice of Russian President Vladimir Putin, Trump would have put the final nail in Hillary’s coffin. Instead, he allowed Hillary Clinton to burrow beneath his skin and fell victim to a liberally complicit moderator, Lester Holt, who kept Trump on the defensive. Hours before the debate, the wealthy Republican candidate fielded an emergency telephone call from Vladimir Putin. The Russian leader urged Trump to admit Nibiru is real and press Hillary Clinton on her stance regarding how to save humanity from the dark star and its seven orbiting planets.

Trump’s campaign manager, Kellyanne Conway, agreed and amended a detailed list of talking points to include a discussion on Nibiru. She told Trump to present evidence substantiating Nibiru’s existence and to demand qualified answers as to why Hillary Clinton and her former master, Barrack Hussein Obama, have perpetuated a cover-up that threatens all humankind. Hillary Clinton and her pal, Lester Holt, managed to derail Trump’s normally focused mind, compelling the Republican candidate to answer banal questions about racism and tax returns rather than addressing an issue of importance to the entire planet.

A source close to the Trump campaign said: “Even though Trump has already promised Nibiru disclosure as his first presidential act, he was prepared to take the plunge last night, and to hammer Hillary Clinton on her failure to address the topic when she was both a senator and the Secretary of State. They distracted him with questions on ridiculous topics—keeping him from going forward with a conversation about Nibiru. Something just happened with Donald.”

Something did happen. Trump was on the ropes, ducking punches and unfair jabs that rendered him confused and unfocused. His opponents baited him, and he took the line and ran with it.  Many expected an unhealthy Hillary Clinton to cough, faint, or drop dead on stage, but drug therapy—or a reptilian body double, some claim—gave her enough strength to muddle through the ninety minute fiasco.

Across the ocean, Russia watched with interest. Russian Ambassador to the United States Vitaly Churkin expressed disappointment at Trump’s failure to address the Nibiru cataclysm. “These Trump is very good man. We like him lots. President Putin prayed Trump have strength to talk about Nibiru, but this not happen,” Churkin said. “Dark forces working here. We hope next debate he regains footing and puts nasty Hillary lady away.”

Our source within the Trump campaign, a close friend of Ivanka, confirmed that dark, ominous forces indeed were working overtime in the underbelly of Hofstra University. According to our source, Trump had almost regained his composure and was on the verge of mentioning Nibiru; but as his lips parted to utter the dark star’s name, his campaign manager spotted sharpshooters in the rafters of the debate hall. They had high-powered rifles aimed at Trump She waved her arms frantically in the air, motioning Trump into an uncharacteristic moment of stunned silence.

“This was obviously a last resort,” our source said,” orchestrated by Hillary Clinton and Barrack Obama—to guarantee Trump’s silence on Nibiru. They could have killed him or his family, and simply blamed it on ISIS, Russia, or China, and declared war.”

Moreover, an unnamed witness allegedly noticed three unmarked, black vans parked outside the debate hall. The vans, he said, were identical to those used by the Libyan hit squad tasked with assassinating Ronald Reagan in 1982.

The next debate airs October 9th. Many topics will likely be discussed. Trump’s convictions will be tested; whether he gathers the strength disclose the Nibiru apocalypse, only time will tell.

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Hurricane Matthew was spawned by Nibiru, says Dr. Ethan Trowbridge, a leading climatologist who was expelled from the USGS for alerting the world about the dark star and its orbiting planets. A category four storm, Hurricane Matthew is currently raging through the Caribbean, with winds topping out at over 150mph. Although tracking models predict the storm will turn sharply east before reaching the southern United States, Dr. Trowbridge warns residents to not underestimate the potentially disastrous consequences of this monster hurricane.

“Nibiru is producing latent heat on our planet. And this has a positive correlation on weather patterns currently being experienced on Earth,” Dr. Trowbridge says. “There are a lot of things the public is not being told, that can influence this storm’s trajectory. Many things factor into this.”

According to Dr. Trowbridge, Nibiru is annihilating arctic sea ice, that its proximity to our inner solar system is pulverizing and altering atmospheric conditions across the globe. Greenland, for example, has lost much of its polar ice, causing the region to darken; the consequences allow solar radiation—from both the sun and Nibiru—to permeate the atmosphere, warm the Earth’s oceans, and destabilize the planet’s crust.

“These are dangerous times,” says Dr. Trowbridge, now in exile. “What happens in the Arctic impacts the world. This is known as the ‘carbolic effect,’ a concept the USGS and its affiliates keep hidden from the public. Greenland has reached its carbolic point, and now Nibiru’s presence is influencing weather all over the planet. Hurricane Matthew is the latest example, and Nibiru is the cause.”

Dr. Trowbridge says the National Weather Service is diluting forecasts to lull Americans into a false sense of security. He accuses the National Hurricane Center in Miami of deceiving the public to delay awareness of the Nibiru system. Regardless of publicized tracking models, he says, Hurricane Matthew has a fifty-fifty chance of striking the southeastern United States as a devastating category 4 Hurricane. Florida should take heed.

“The Earth will be experiencing cataclysmic events long before Nibiru reaches 0.3 au,” Dr. Trowbridge says. Super storms, many of which go unreported, are engulfing our planet. These are perilous times for mankind. Nibiru is real and it’s here. Detractors use spurious logic and flimsy evidence to argue against its existence, but the preponderance of evidence supporting its existence and current location are overwhelming.”

Temperature gradients relative to the equator help spawn and exacerbate storms on a planet wide scale, serving as a catalyst to ramp up unnatural weather phenomena. Nibiru’s rotational spin as it swings around the backside of the sun is creating havoc. The frequency, severity, and intensity of severe weather events will increase tenfold a Nibiru approaches Earth.

“Nibiru is causing a global climate change emergency,” Dr. Trowbridge says, “and we are powerless to stop it.”

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Nibiru Storm Update 10/04/2016 5:52 PM EST: SkyNews reports one million people in South Carolina will be evacuated ahead of the storm. Dr. Trowbridge has been vindicated.

Last week, former USGS climatologist Dr. Ethan Trowbridge warned an apathetic US government that Hurricane Matthew would track west after passing between Haiti and Cuba. He stood alone. All publicized forecasts at that time predicted the storm to curve east, out to sea, sparing the southeast coast a direct hit from a monstrous storm. For his efforts, Dr. Trowbridge was jeered and ridiculed; his peers called him ‘a deluded, fear-mongering hack.’  It seems they were wrong. Dr. Trowbridge’s predication has manifested. Hurricane Matthew, still an enormous Category 4 storm with wind speeds exceeding 140 mph, has turned east and now threatens to make landfall in either Florida or North Carolina, just as Dr. Trowbridge predicted.

Haiti has taken a pummeling from the storm. The death toll is catastrophic, unreported by the mainstream media. According to our source located on the impoverished island nation, buildings have toppled; floodwaters and torrential rainfall have engulfed the island nation. Unconfirmed reports indicate at least 5,000 already dead; hospitals are overwhelmed with critically wounded patients.

“What happened in Haiti today may well happen in Florida or North Carolina on Wednesday or Thursday,” said Dr. Trowbridge. “I gave ample warning, but no one listened. I tried to explain that Nibiru’s rotational spin as it sweeps around the sun is affecting all weather on earth, and that established forecasting trends must be abolished in favor of new methods. But no one listened.”

With no signs of slowing or weakening, Hurricane Matthew now takes aim at Florida.  Yesterday, Governor Rick Scott declared a statewide “state of emergency,” urging all residents to prepare for mandatory evacuation orders. Matthew’s damage, he said, might eclipse the devastation Hurricane Andrew caused in 1992.

Dr. Trowbridge, a former resident of the sunshine state, fears for friends and family still living in Florida. “I am very concerned for them,” Dr. Trowbridge said. “Florida has a lot of elderly people and small children that will be at risk. Pets too. I made my best effort to explain the nature of the carbolic effect and its ramifications to our ecosphere, but, still, no one was listening. Now, maybe they will.”

Nibiru’s infuence will cause storms to increase in frequency, size, and intensity. The Atlantic basin, says Dr. Trowbridge, is a ‘kettle of unpredictability’ with Nibiru in our backyard. When asked if he had additional predictions, Dr. Trowbridge hung his head and said, “There is no more hurricane season. There is no more tornado season. This is Nibiru season.”

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Allegedly wealthy Republican nominee Donald J. Trump should have demolished Hillary Clinton during the first presidential debate, seen by over 100 million viewers worldwide. Many—including Russian President Vladimir Putin—expected Trump to confront Clinton on the Nibiru cover-up, but unexpected events transpired, causing Trump to tailspin out of control. His normally focused mind was compromised; his ordinary calm demeanor yielded to an odd quiescence, as unexpected as Hillary’s head nodding or slow blinking characteristic of Parkinson’s. The Trump that America has come to know and love turned into something else—a blithering pile of goo unable to structure a simple sentence or convey his thoughts. Trump was certainly in no condition to discuss the approaching Nibiru cataclysm, or any complicated subject matter.

Viewers and readers around the world took notice, and expressed alarm at Trump’s sudden evaporation. The Saker, an English language website written by Russian expatriates, collected an alarming number of comments that accurately reflect the debate’s shocking outcome.

One commentator wrote: Since I might be asked about that, I might as well share my opinion about the debate tonight.  Frankly?  I was absolutely horrified.  I had expected Trump to completely slaughter Hillary, but what happened tonight was the exact opposite.  My son put it best “it looked like a kindergartner trying to argue with a college professor.”

Another: Hillary knew all the tricks, she was superbly prepared and she truly is a world-class liar. Oh, and she also looked healthy and in control (so much for the Hillary is sick and cannot control her temper theory; when she wants, she clearly can)

And another: Trump looked completely outclassed, he spent most of the time on defensive (Hillary attacked him almost immediately).  Worst of all, not only did he called her “Secretary Clinton” while she called him “Donald”, but he regularly uttered “here I partially/generally agree with Secretary Clinton” whereas she, of course, never agreed on anything.  If the ability to lie, to frame a question and to use ugly ad hominems are the weapons of politics, then Hillary totally out-gunned Trump.

A few more:

Trump was mostly passive and constantly on the defense.  He also repeated himself so many times his one-liners soon turned boring and stale.  In contrast, Hillary easily eluded each one of his attack and always had a comeback ready.  Finally and predictably, the moderator was clearly hostile to Trump, as was the crowd which resulted in several “you are no Kennedy, Senator” moments.

The moment when Trump agreed to the obscene notion of people which have been put on the “do not fly” list also being denied their 2nd Amendment rights probably lost him all the libertarian votes.  As for the progressive vote, he probably lost it when he brazenly admitted using US bankruptcy laws to protect his business interests.  His constant attacks against Iran and his reference to Bibi Netanyahu certainly proves his clumsy (and futile!) attempts at appeasing the Israel Lobby.  And when Hillary brilliantly hammered him with the accusation that racism made him question Obama’s birth certificate, Trump found nothing better to retort than to say that he was proud that a club he created in Palm Beach was commended for not discriminating against “against African-Americans, against Muslims, against anybody”.  This was actually painful to watch.

One brief, insightful, ominous comment stood out above the rest: Tonight, listening to this catastrophe I found myself thinking that if Trump could not stop Hillary, Putin would have to, and that this would be very, very dangerous for the entire planet.

This is a sobering comment, the thoughts of which have been echoed by the Kremlin. A Foreign Service report, prepared by the Russian Ministry of Defense, illustrates Russia’s disappointment in Trump’s debate performance: “Russia had high hopes that Mr. Trump would destroy evil Hillary Clinton. But this did not happen and has caused much alarm within our government. Trump is our last hope for peace. President Putin knows that Hillary Clinton will never disclose Nibiru, as Trump has promised to do. Hillary, like Obama, will try to block it. And this we cannot allow, no matter what the cost. What happened to Trump, we do not know, but something did happen and we would like to know why,” the report concluded.

Initially, this website attributed Trump’s collapse to two factors: Hillary’s exemplary debate preparation and a liberally aligned moderator, working in collusion to stump Trump. After a careful analysis of the facts, we realized there was more to this story, and that something was afoot. Our professional investigators ferreted out the true reason Donald Trump flubbed the debate. The investigation demonstrates that Trumps lackluster performance can be attributed to more than simply poor preparation: Donald Trump had been drugged.

A company titled Corporate Coffee Systems (CCS) is the leading distributor of bottled Evian water in New York State, and is the organization Trump has used to provide drinking water to his campaign hotspots across the country. Records also prove he had twelve cases of Evian water delivered to the debate at Hofstra University.

After the debate, our embedded source observed strange behavior at Trump’s campaign headquarters.

“Despite Trump’s loss to Hillary, they were partying like it was the end of the world. It was a wild party. Donald was dancing to rap music, drinking, and shouting obscenities into the air. Ivanka was dancing on a table, twerking. And Melina almost disrobed in front of everyone. Kellyanne Conway, Trump’s campaign manager, vanished into a private bedroom with a visiting Russian dignitary who I cannot name, but his initials are VP,” our source revealed.

This information prompted our investigation into the drinking water, the outcome of which hints at a diabolical scheme designed to scuttle his campaign before he can expose Hillary’s deepest, darkest secrets. To understand the gravity of the situation, facts must me made clear:

Fact I: Donald Trump loves Evian water

Fact II: Trump must have fresh water, and all unopened bottles from the previous day are exchanged for new bottles.  So, Donald Trump’s Evian had to be delivered daily, between 1:00 PM and 2:00 PM.

Fact III: Until the day of the debate, all shipments arrived exactly on time.

Fact IV: The September 26 shipment to Hofstra University and Trump’s campaign headquarters arrived several hours late.

The inescapable concussion is that something happened during those missing hours, causing the delay in shipment. If only one delivery was late, a rational person would chalk it up to coincidence; the tardiness of both deliveries paints a more sinister picture, hinting at foul play. Our secret source obtained shipping manifests and GPS reports for both delivery vehicles, tracing their progress from Evian’s distribution center to their final destinations. One vehicle made an unscheduled pit-stop at the Blue Moon Motel in Vail Mills, NY. Highly credible witnesses observed the driver exiting the vehicle, accompanies by a tall, blonde woman.

“I saw the driver get out of the truck with the woman,” said Flora Florantina, a motel cleaning lady. “Five minutes after they had checked in, another delivery truck arrived, parked next to the first one, and unloaded cases of water. Two uniformed delivery men loaded cases into the first truck. I passed by two minutes later, as they were loading cases into the second van; then they drove off at once. They could not have been there more than five minutes. I think this was all very strange. Later, I call my sister, who does housekeeping at the Lost Dog Motel in Mosherville, and what do you know? She said the same exact thing happened where she works!”

This presents a frightening scenario: it is likely the “beautiful woman” that Flora Florantina saw was a “honeypot” who intercepted and seduced the delivery driver. Was she planted by the Hillary campaign to keep the driver occupied while her associates tampered with the Evian water shipment? We have no evidence for that as yet; but does any reader have a better expiation for the waylaying of deliverymen at both the Blue Moon and Lost Dog motels.

Our source recovered three half-empty water bottles from the debate hall. He examined them under ultra-violet light for signs of tampering, and discovered that the bottom of each bottle had been punctured; an eight-micron hole, created with a hypodermic syringe, had been resealed. The bottles were sent to the Carlson Company—a world leader in forensic testing—and underwent a comprehensive battery of tests. Each bottle contained trace elements of Lysergic acid diethylamide, a recreational drug more commonly known as LSD.

Although no conclusive evidence links Hillary Clinton to this treacherous crime, most sane and reasonable people can put the pieces of the puzzle together and determine for themselves who masterminded this operation against Donald Trump.

We called both Sorcha Faal and the Washington Times, offering to share our findings with them, for a moderate five-figure fee, but they hung up on us.

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In a candid interview with Pravda, Russian President Vladimir Putin stated implicitly that he would tell the world about Nibiru if Donald J. Trump loses the presidential election. In July and August, we ran a series of articles highlighting a three decade long secret war between the White House and the Kremlin, culminating in a confidential agreement between Putin and Trump. Putin promised to remain silent about Nibiru, and in exchange, Trump vowed to dismantle and expose the Nibiru cover-up as his first presidential act. At the time, Trump’s ascension to the White House seemed certain. In light of recent events, however, Trump’s presidential bid is in serious jeopardy, and Vladimir Putin has strong fears that Trump will lose the election and thus be unable to make good on his promise.

A Foreign Service Report, translated by the Russian Ministry of Defense, details Putin’s inner turmoil: “President Putin no like Hillary Clinton Lady. She very, very evil. When President Putin and Mr. Trump met, we had no doubt he would be next American President and reveal Nibiru. Comrade Trump we like him very much. He is wealthy and wise, but he put foot in mouth many times, and this Hillary lady has the dirt on him. Now Putin thinks real chance Trump will lose. And this will force Putin to act without hesitation.”

President Putin, the report continues, will refrain from making a decision until November 8, when election results are tallied. He has promised not to make an announcement based solely on exit polls. In the event of a Trump defeat, Putin plans immediately to disclose Nibiru on all major Russian television networks, including RT news. According to usually reliable sources, Putin has a hidden broadcasting location in an underground bunker somewhere in the enclave of Kaliningrad. From this secret fortress, Putin will act quickly and decisively, before Hillary Clinton has an opportunity to launch an offensive that would forever scuttle his chances of eviscerating the Nibiru cover-up.

“We have no doubt that Hillary Clinton is prepared to take any and all actions to prevent Nibiru disclosure,” a source within the Kremlin said. “She may even try to drone strike President Putin. But we have taken all precautions to ensure President Putin’s safety and guarantee that the world will know about these Nibiru. We still hope Trump wins and none of this becomes necessary.”

That comment represents an alarming revelation: it implies that Hillary Clinton is willing to risk World War III to stop Vladimir Putin from uttering the word Nibiru.

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Never in history have Americans witnessed a more vicious general election than is being played out between Hillary Clinton and Donald J. Trump. In the past weeks, voters have been distracted by allegations of lewd and lascivious conduct, Putin-hacked emails, and a plethora of accusations designed to damage each candidate’s credibility. Despite unprecedented levels of global coverage surrounding Clinton and Trump, the mainstream media has willfully avoided a topic of interest that could derail Hillary’s campaign and fast-track Trump into the Oval Office; that topic is the looming Nibiru cataclysm.

As previously reported, Trump has pledged to abolish the Nibiru cover-up and alert the world as his first presidential act. He agreed to sign an executive order which would effectively supersede and rescind an executive order signed by Ronald Reagan in 1983—a document prohibiting any government official, person of power, or scientist with credible information from uttering the word Nibiru. Trump’s willingness to embrace a taboo subject shocked the world, earning him respect in the so-called pseudo-science and conspiracy theorist communities. To win the election, Trump needs more than women and African Americans to vote for him; he needs the Nibiru vote, especially in key battleground states.

The value of the Nibiru vote cannot be underestimated. America’s top conspiracy forum, GodlikeProductions.com, boasts over one million registered users—and countless anonymous users, a majority of whom accept the existence of Nibiru and are eager for the cover-up to be dismantled. When Trump was recently quoted as saying, “the shackles have been taken off,” Nibiru believers rejoiced, understanding his implied message.

Without their vote, however, Trump will lose the election. He faces a huge hurdle: Nibiru believers disdain elected officials and tend to sit-out elections. Trump must win their hearts and minds, and encourage them to vote on November 8th.

To gauge Nibiru’s potential impact on the election, this website contracted The Roper Company, a world leader in polling technology, to conduct a poll across all fifty-two states. Due to financial restrictions, we could afford only their “budget plan,” but statistical accuracy and integrity is nonetheless guaranteed. A strong emphasis was placed on battle ground states like Florida and Ohio. The Roper Company surveyed three random citizens in every state, to ensure an accurate sample base. Results were collected in aggregate, and the dataset checked for cross-tabulation, continuous variables, and population parameters. The results clearly proved that residents of some states favored Nibiru over residents in other states. Southern voters, for example, expressed keen interest in the dark star and its orbiting planets, whereas a majority of northeastern voters eschewed Nibiru and said that Trump’s impending disclosure would not influence their votes, with one geographical exception. Residents of Mayfield, New York, a small village in the Adirondack Mountains, adore Donald Trump, his policies and procedures.

Asked what he thought of Trump’s recent scandals, lifelong Mayfield resident Herbert Allen said, “I dun care about no tax returns or pussy talk. I wanna know about that there Nibiru.”

Our meticulous survey yielded the follow results:

As illustrated, Nibiru opposition holds a clear advantage over Nibiru proponents. Donald Trump must seize control of several key states to secure a presidential victory. Knowing that states like New York and California are a lost cause, Trump has tripped his campaign efforts in Florida, Pennsylvania, and Ohio, hoping those pivotal locations will propel him to the White House. A Trump insider, speaking under conditions of anonymity, said, “Trump hopes to win Arizona and Wisconsin. There are a lot of conspiracy theorists in those states who could help sway the election in his favor.”

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A few weeks ago, some media outlets reported a story about a Chinese man, Yang Qingpei, who brutally killed his parents over a domestic financial dispute, and then murdered seventeen additional people in his home village in a failed attempt to conceal the crime. Due to China’s strict gun control policies, he hacked his victims to pieces with a machete.  China’s Xinhua state news agency has yet to release a complete list of victims, but our source within the secretive nation obtained shocking information that eviscerates the official story and proves that the nineteen murders were indeed committed to conceal a hidden motive. But it had nothing to do with a financial dispute. It had everything to do with silencing a potential Nibiru whistle-blower.

One victim was Kum Hia Nao, a research assistant at the Chinese National Astronomical Observatory, part of the Chinese Academy of Sciences. According to usually reliable sources, Nao had worked at the country’s Five Hundred Meter Aperture Spherical Telescope (FAST,) and had been reprimanded twice for making inquiries about Nibiru, said to be a brown dwarf with seven orbiting planets on a near-collision course with Earth.  Conflicting reports make it difficult to determine exactly when Nao learned about Nibiru, either before or after being assigned to the observatory. Regardless, he was courageous enough to discuss a taboo subject in a country that routinely executes citizens for speaking out of line. His superiors obviously noticed his rebellious behavior, because, if all information is accurate, they concocted an elaborate plan to end his life and hide the motive for the crime. Unconfirmed reports, supported by two credible witnesses, place Barrack Hussein Obama and newly elected Nibiru Czar Victoria Newland at the observatory sometime during Obama’s recent trip to China, where he attended the G20 summit.

On September 27, Nao visited his grandparents at a remote village in southwest China’s Yunnan Province.  He had previously filed a ‘vacation report’ with his employer, detailing his travel times and locations, pinpointing exactly where he would be located.

“They could easily track his movements,” our source said. Many people in China are compelled to file a detailed report prior to taking a leave of absence from work. The slightest deviation has dire consequences. So if you file a report, you stick to it, like glue. Kum Hia Nao never stood a chance against anyone who wished to end his life.”

The attacks happened on September 30. Nao and his grandparents were enjoying a quite dinner of rice and minced meat when Yang Qingpei burst into the hovel and one by one slaughtered them with a machete, the assassin’s sixth, seventh, and eighth victims of the night. Yang Qingpei went on to kill an additional seven people in a calculated, murderous rampage that stunned a nation.

“Qingpei was no ordinary citizen,” our source said. “He was a highly skilled, highly trailed killer.  What are the odds of an untrained person, armed only with a knife, killing nineteen people, many of whom were physically larger and stronger than he appeared.”

Yang Qingpei, it turns out, served four years in The People’s Liberation Army Special Forces. He was also an expert in Kung-Fu. Fitting the puzzle pieces together, the logical conclusion is that he was contracted to carry out the brutal murders. He probably had no idea one his victims was a Nibiru scientist.

“It’s highly unlikely they told him anything about his victims,” our source said. “They probably said kill your parents, say it was over money, confess to it, we’ll get you off the hook, and you’ll be handsomely rewarded down the line. They gave him a list of people to kill, along with some random victims, and, sadly, Kum Hia Nao’s name was on that list.”

This demonstrates that the United States is not the only country to silence, discredit, or murder potential whistle-blowers, and that, with the exception of Vladimir Putin and Fidel Castro, world leaders will try to prevent Nibiru disclosure, at any cost.

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On September 23, we published a story detailing a collaborative effort between Russia and North Korea to launch a nuclear strike at Nibiru.  North Korea, aided by cutting-edge Russian technology, planned to assault Nibiru using ICBMs retrofitted to accommodate a human passenger—to pilot the warhead during its final phase of flight. Moreover, we reported that Kim Jung-un, North Korea’s murderous dictator, volunteered his wife and his mother for astronaut duty.  Today, mainstream media outlets including Fox News and The Independent reported that North Korea’s first lady vanished from public view approximately seven months ago. Some claim she is pregnant, others fear Kim Jung-Un’s schizophrenic sister might have murdered her. The truth, however, is that Ri-Sol Ju—Kim’s beloved wife—is en route to Nibiru aboard a modified intercontinental ballistic missile.

Our confidential source in Pyongyang provided shocking information solidifying our initial story and proving that Ri-Sol Ju was launched into space. On October 20, North Korea tested its anti-Nibiru defense system; the missile lifted off from the Tonghae Satellite Launching Ground located on the eastern peninsula, also known as North Korea’s Space Coast. The mainstream media, operating in collusion with the Obama administration, reported the “incident” as another failed launch attempt by a tyrant flexing his nuclear muscles.

“The Obama administration had to conceal the truth,” our source said. “It pressured the press into going along with a story about a missile that failed to leave its launch pad. This is a blatant lie. In fact, it’s quite possible other launch attempts may have been successful. Why would Obama want to hide this? First, it would alert the world to Nibiru. Second, it would demonstrate that Kim Jong-un is really a loving, caring man who cares about humanity’s future. Think about it: sending your spouse on a one-way trip to stop Nibiru is a far more compassionate act than shooting her in the head. She is providing a valuable service to God, country, and Supreme Leader.”

Asked about Ri-sol Ju’s mysterious disappearance, our source said that she, along with eleven other volunteers, was enrolled into North Korea’s secret astronaut training program, hidden from prying eyes at the country’s Musudan-ri training facility, allegedly shielded from satellite observation using stolen Ukrainian stealth technology.

“The training program is quite comprehensive,” our source said. “Similar to NASA’s, except for this detail: enrolling in the space program guarantees a longer life to the enrolled astronauts. Most reasonable persons would rather die for the greater good of humankind than bleed out from bullet wounds. This way, they go out in a blaze of glory. Make no mistake, these fortunate few are treated lavishly for the duration of training—given two servings of rice a day and a soft wooden bed, instead of a cold, stone floor, on which to sleep. Mrs. Un was no exception. They treated her like royalty during the rigorous ordeal.”

He compared the physical preparedness to that undertaken by United States Navy Seals. They hiked twelve miles a day, chanting and singing songs about the Glorious Leader. They swam in North Korea’s shark-infested waters. Just like Navy Seals, all anti-Nibiru defense candidates could drop out of the program by simply passing in front of an active 30mm anti-aircraft gun.

“Fortunately for Mrs. Un, she graduated at the top of her class, exceeding all expectations and earning meritorious praise from her husband,” our source revealed. “She was chosen to be the first woman to go to Nibiru.”

The country held a parade in her honor, and October 20th, armed guards escorted Ri-sol Ju to the launch facility and seated her in the modified capsule. Around 6:30 am Pyongyang time, she blasted off into space in Nibiru’s general direction, allegedly using coordinates Kim Jong-un had obtained from “GLP,” a popular internet conspiracy forum.

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Loyal readers may have noticed our two-week long sabbatical from publishing stories about Nibiru and other useful information found on this website. We apologize for the lack up updates—a dire situation emerged that required our prompt and immediate attention. Despite being a shoestring operation with limited resources, we acted quickly and decidedly to prevent our own extinction. On October 17th, we received a “cease and desist” order from the Clinton Campaign, authored by Huma Abedin and David Kendall, chief counsel to Hillary Clinton.

They alleged we had defamed Mrs. Clinton by publishing unproven stories detrimental to her character. They cited two specific examples, but rather than detail them in this memo, I’ve provided links to the articles in question, should anyone care to read them. Furthermore, they alleged that we were working in cohoots with President Putin to derail her chances of reaching the Oval office. Clearly, the order demanded we retract the stories, issue a public apology, and sign an affidavit guaranteeing that that we disappear from the internet, never to be seen again. They threatened us with legal action if we failed to comply.

We opted to stop publishing stories, while we conferred with our attorneys, of the esteemed New York law firm Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe. We provided them with all source material, sworn statements, and names of our confidential sources, with a guarantee that any sensitive information remains privileged.

Two weeks later, our lead attorney informed us that the Clinton campaign had no basis for legal action and that all threats on its behalf were meaningless. At that point, we resumed operations.

On a personal note, I am deeply troubled that Hillary Clinton tried to strike us down; Someonesbones.com is strictly bi-partisan in all political matters, though it has openly supported and endorsed Donald J. Trump for president, for he is the candidate who will dismantle the Nibiru cover-up.

Again, we apologize for this inconvenience, and hope our loyal readers, believers, skeptics, and noteworthy debunkers, stand beside us in solidarity against persons who threaten the 1st Amendment.

Below is a link to the stories mentioned above.

Hillary Clinton’s Future Military

Trump’s Debate Disaster Explained

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Former CIA operator Dr. Steve Pieczenik has surfaced from the shadow world to warn American citizens about a clandestine coup instigated by the Clinton campaign. Steve Pieczenik, MD, PhD, is a psychiatrist, former United States Department of State official, author, and publisher. He Studied at Cornell, Harvard, and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology; his credentials are unimpeachable.  He also worked as a spook, a psychological intelligence officer, with the Central Intelligence Agency. Last week, he published a YouTube video asserting that he—and other former intelligence operatives—is currently involved in an electronic counter-coup to prevent Hillary Clinton from reaching the White House. According to Pieczenik, he and his associates provided WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange with the controversial emails that have mired Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign.

Moreover, our Washington source, a former Federal agent and friend of Dr. Pieczenik, provided alarming information on yet unreleased Clinton emails. He spoke privately with Dr. Pieczenik, and learned a truth that could shake the world to its core.

“We have yet to provide Assange with all the emails,” Pieczenik told our source. “Nibiru is real, and Hillary Clinton knows about it.” A “top secret” email, siphoned from Clinton’s controversial private email server, paints a sinister picture, proving that Clinton helped orchestrate a Nibiru dis-information campaign while she served as Secretary of State in 2010.

The Clinton authored email was sent to Frank Podesta and Huma Abedin. It outlined a comprehensive, sinister plan to employ dis-information specialists to psychologically influence public opinion about Nibiru, said to be a brown dwarf star and seven orbiting planets on a near collision course with Earth.

An excerpt from the unreleased email reads: “According to latest NASA/NSA research, the object currently known as Nibiru/Planet X is rapidly approaching the inner solar system. Its effects are being felt on the planet already. We must contain this until the last possible moment. Please immediately use all possible, plausible sources to discourage people from believing such a threat exists. To sway/condition opinion, sources must infiltrate/coopt commonly accessed internet forums/websites.”

The 5,000-word email contains additional information on Nibiru’s threat to planet Earth, including, our source says, an expected date of arrival.

“When I spoke to Dr. Pieczenik, he was gravely concerned,” our source said. “He has information that will cripple Hillary’s campaign. The Nibiru information is his ‘ace in the hole.’  He and his people are guarding this information with their lives.”

Pieczenik and his team are eager to scuttle Hillary’s presidential bid, but admit hesitation at releasing the ‘Nibiru email’ because Donald Trump has promised to denudate the three-decade cover-up if he wins the election.

“We would rather Trump or Putin address this issue,” Dr. Pieczenik confessed. “But if necessary, we have taken steps to ensure this information goes public prior to Election Day. We have faith in both Donald Trump and President Putin.”

Dr. Piecznick and his team have taken drastic measures not only to ensure the truth goes public but also to guarantee the safety of his friends, family, and associates.  He sent his family to an unnamed non-extradition country to protect them from Clinton retaliation.

“We will closely watch the electoral map and the polls,” Dr. Pieczenick said. “Two days before the election, if it appears that Hillary will steal it, we will forward the Nibiru to Assange.”

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An inside source with close ties to the Trump campaign provided shocking information as to Donald Trump’s plans for election night. If he wins the election, Trump will reveal the existence of Nibiru—said to be a brown dwarf star and seven planets on a near-collision course with Earth—during his victory speech. The information stems from a source with unimpeachable credentials, a friend and associate of the Republican nominee. For this to happen, however, Trump must diminish Hillary Clinton’s four-point lead in the polls, or prove the pollsters wrong and win the election in a landslide.

Hillary Clinton, on the other hand, belongs to a cabal devoted to concealing the truth about Nibiru until the last possible moment, in hopes that she and her elitist friends can weather the storm in underground bunkers and rise to build the world anew once the dust settles.

“President Trump will not permit this charade to continue,” our source said. “He knows Hillary’s plans, and, sadly, she knows his—that is why Clinton is desperate to stop him. But Trump will prevail, and once and for all demolish the Nibiru cover-up, allowing Americans to take whatever actions they deem necessary to prepare for the worst possible scenario. You know, a lot of people have wondered why Trump has not devoted more than just one-hundred million dollars of his own money toward the campaign. Well, he’s been putting that money to a much more important issue.”

Unsealed records, obtained via the Freedom of Information Act, indicate that Trump has spent over thirty million dollars on Nibiru research. He enlisted the aid of prominent, ostracized NASA scientists, people like astronomers Paul Cox and Dr. Stephen Greenbaum, to study Nibiru’s expected impact on Earth. Trump’s scientific advisers admit that Nibiru will ravage the earth, but have posited that Nibiru will not arrive until the winter of 2019, a significant deviation from previously established forecasts.

“Future President Trump has high confidence in his scientific team,” our source said. “He will use the added time to warn and help prepare Americans to survive the Nibiru cataclysm. He will fulfill his promise to President Putin. Unless they get to Trump first. But he’s well protected. You saw what happened in Reno.”

Saturday afternoon, a protester disrupted a Trump rally in Reno, Nevada. Austyn Crites, a Democrat posing as a disgruntled Republican, attempted to incite a mass riot during Trump’s second really of the day. The United States Secret Service rushed into action, whisking Trump off the stage before Crites neared the podium. Against the advice his protective entourage, Trump triumphantly returned to the stage to finish delivering his message to the American people. We later learned that Crites has a criminal arrest record and is a known agent provocateur employed by the Democratic National Committee. The secret service discovered a pair of silencer-equipped .45 caliber handguns, a miniature flame-thrower, and a pocketknife on his person.

“Hillary Clinton has demonstrated her willingness to stop at nothing to stop Trump,” our source said. “This potential assassination attempt shows her resolve to eliminate Trump before election night. Regardless, Trump will prevail and tell the world about Nibiru, hopefully on election night.”

Following Hillary’s concession announcement, President-elect Trump and special guest astronomer Paul Cox will take center stage and warn the world about the forthcoming Nibiru cataclysm.

“This will be the most Earth shattering annoucment ever made,” our source said. “Donald Trump is a caring man. A man of principle and character. He is a family man who loves his wife and children. He wants people be aware of the threat while he and his team try to find a means to stop that threat.”

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Donald Trump scored a shocking and historic upset victory in the presidential election Wednesday morning, defying predictions and winning important battleground states to capture the White House. He did more than that; his victory over Hillary Clinton prevented a certain nuclear conflict with Russia, where an anxious Vladimir Putin nervously watched election results rolling in.

Trump’s promise to do away with the Nibiru cover-up was a topic of paramount importance, but was never allowed to surface during the campaign. As proven by previously published stories, Putin and Trump earlier this year had signed a memorandum of understanding on how to handle the Nibiru affair.

Kellyanne Conway, Trump’s campaign manager, explained to our source the state of the current Trump Nibiru plan:

“He stood ready to deliver bad news about the impending Nibiru cataclysm,” Conway told our source. “However, his chosen Nibiru Czar, Admiral William J. “Not On My Watch” Fallon pleaded for a delay, to prepare his military teams. Fallon, argued that strategic placement of military assets had to be positioned in advance of Nibiru disclosure.”

As early results ticked in, both candidates were secreted away in hidden locations in New York City, editing and finalizing victory speeches. After Trump won Florida, Ohio, and Pennsylbania, Huma Abedin, a Clinton confidante whose blunt emails were among those released by Wikileaks, was spotted sneaking out of the Jacob Javits Center, where Hillary hoped to give her victory announcement.

“Huma Abedin was sobbing in tears,” our mole within the Clinton campaign said. “She tried to escape unnoticed, but we managed to corner and question her before she fled the venue.”

Asked why Hillary Clinton seemed doomed to lose, Abedin said, “I don’t want to talk about it. Donald Trump stole a piece of my soul tonight. He took a piece of all of us. Hillary Clinton is a good woman and would have warned the world about Nibiru—in her own time. Now things are worse. The world is shocked.”

Reaction in Western Europe was muted as people digested the shocking upset, but Moscow breathed a collective sigh of relief, as battleground states turned to Trump’s advantage. A smiling Vladimir Putin sat down at the “Kremlin teletype” and sent the following message to Trump:

To my dear friend, President-elect Donald J. Trump, I congratulate you on your victory over the evil Hillary, a woman maddened by ambition. Together, we shall forge the world anew and prepare civilization for the coming Nibiru disaster. I know that our agreement stands and that Nibiru disclosure will come at the earliest opportunity. All other issues take a back seat to this mission upon which we embark. Don’t worry about Syria, don’t worry about the Ukraine—minor issues we can solve later. Together, we must apply our combined efforts to solving the Nibiru threat. In closing, I must confess we stood ready for war last night. Some guys had proposed that we launch if Hillary won. Your friend, Vladimir Putin.

Sources inside the Kremlin confirmed that Russia had briefly set its nuclear offense forces to “zachchita usloviye 2,” that country’s equivalent of Defcon 2, its highest state of readiness since the 2011 Astana revolt.

In New York, the atmosphere turned joyous as Trump supporters smelled victory in the air. Rudy Giuliani, former NYC mayor and senior Trump adviser, was quoted as saying. “Nothing can stop the Trump train. If Hillary Clinton couldn’t stop him, neither will Nibiru.”

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In a shocking upset that made pollsters and pundits question career choices, Donald J. Trump vanquished Hillary Clinton to become the 45th President of the United States. He overcame a biased media, rabid liberals, and, most of all, rampant election fraud. Dead people, Trump argued, routinely voted for Democratic candidates. Tuesday night, a dead Nibiru scientist voted for Hillary Clinton.

Robert Sutton Harrington inexplicably died in 1993, but somehow showed up in Allegheny County, Pennsylvania Tuesday night. According to our source, he voted straight-line Democrat, using a paper ballot instead of the electronic voting booths within the facility. Harrington, however, never lived in the Key Stone State; born in Virginia, he traveled extensively, but never declared residency in Pennsylvania.

A Census Bureau records check eliminated the possibility of another person with the same name casting that vote. Only one person named “Robert Sutton Harrington” has ever been born in the United States, and he was a devout Republican who campaigned for and endorsed his party’s candidates. It’s unlikely the person assuming Harrington’s identity knew he was impersonating a famous astronomer whose life was mired in controversy over the existence of Nibiru, said to be a brown dwarf star and seven orbiting planets hurtling toward Earth.

A polling official, asking to remain anonymous, said the impostor acted “oddly.” He wore gold-rimmed glassed and what appeared to be a fake mustache. “He was also chewing gum,” she said.

Shortly before his unexpected death, Harrington postulated that Nibiru, also known as Planet X, was real and posed a ‘clear and present danger’ to Earth. He based his theories on data collected by NASA’s Infra-Red Astronomical Satellite, a device that surveyed over 250,000 infra-red signatures, including Nibiru, during its ten month mission.

Harrington died in 1993. Thought to be in good health at the time, he developed “sudden onset esophageal cancer” and perished two days before attending a scheduled astronomical conference. Truth seekers believe that “the powers that be” murdered Harrington to ensure his eternal silence.

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The wealthy are preparing for the Nibiru cataclysm, according to a story initially broken by CBS and later reported on The Drudge Report. According to whistle-blowers—including ostracized NASA scientists and political figureheads—the Nibiru apocalypse is upon us. Said to be a brown dwarf star with seven orbiting planets on a near collision course with earth, Nibiru has been a controversial subject with conspiracy theorists and truth seekers for over three decades. The government, they argue, has actively colluded with mainstream media to conceal the truth: that sometime soon—dates are speculative—Nibiru will ravage the Earth, causing unprecedented tsunamis, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, and worse, as it nears our inner solar system.

Nibiru scientists and researchers have debated Nibiru’s expected date of arrival, but generally agree that the dark star will pass between Earth and the Sun around Christmas 2017, 2019, or 2063, depending on the source. Former NASA scientist Dr. Ronald Shimschuck opined that Nibiru would reach perihelion in late 2017, and cause a near-extinction level event (ELE) on reaching .3 astronomical units—approximately thirty million miles—from Earth.

“This will be a horrible time for humankind,” Dr. Shimschuck said. “Humanity, as we know it, will face a great challenge when Nibiru, or Planet X, passes between Earth and Sol. I have seen the data, I have seen the timetables. This is happening now.”

Former USGS climatologist Dr. Ethan Trowbridge was quoted as saying, “There is no more Hurricane season. There is no more tornado season. This is Nibiru season.”

Our exclusive source, a Wall Street wizard and financial expert operating under the pseudonym “Mr. Black,” reported that his wealthiest clients—millionaires and billionaires—had sold their assets to build elaborate shelters in hopes of surviving the impending Nibiru apocalypse. With one years’ delay, mainstream media reports have substantiated his revelations.

“I tried to tell people months ago,” said Mr. Black. “But they just wouldn’t listen. I was warning people as to what is going on right now. The wealthiest people in the world, including President-elect Donald J. Trump, are spending millions and trillions of dollars on complex survival shelters to ride out Nibiru.”

Today, CBS confirmed Mr. Black’s discovery. An unnamed, shadowy investment group has devoted $300,000,000 dollars toward constructing an underground community replete with retail space and private homes. The development, located northeast of Dallas, Texas, will have an equestrian center, an eighteen-hole golf course, gun ranges, polo fields, restaurants, and elevator-lift helipads—all located one-half a mile beneath the Earth’s surface.

A construction worker, speaking under conditions of anonymity, said, “This will be a place for society’s elite to survive whatever disaster might come. Be it a nuclear bomb or a space borne crisis like Nibiru. Blast doors will protect them from the worst possible threats. It will have off-grid energy and its own water reclamation facility. State of the art.”

To prevent boredom and insanity, the lavish community will also contain a 1:1 scale replica of the New York Stock Exchange, so wealthy residents can simulate a typical 9-to-5 workweek while the outside world burns. The investment firm retained renowned media personalities—like Fox News’s Megyn Kelly and Bill O’Reilly—to provide residents with an endless stream of fictional news.

A casino, complete with blackjack, poker, and slot machines, will offer residents hours of fun and entertainment, said Jeff Downing, a silent investment partner.

“While the world above us disappears, we aim to give our residents the illusion of normalcy,” Jeff downing said. “They’re not going to want to hear that Nibiru has scorched the Earth, killing friends and relatives. So we have paid important personalities large sums of money to get on-board with our project. They’ll deliver news to give our residents good feelings. Kelly and O’Reilly will enjoy Trident Lake housing at no charge. However, since the dollar will have no value after a nuclear of Niburan holocaust, it has been agreed that, after D-Day, Mr O’Reilly and Ms. Kelly will be paid in tuna fish cans and pickled eggs.”

A future resident, also wishing to remain anonymous, confided that he has already shelled out two-million dollars for a fifteen-hundred square foot home within the underground community. “This is not just some hole to hide your head in,” he said. “This will be one of the greatest survival resorts in the world. I expect my family to survive Nibiru, and Trident Lakes [the name of the facility] gives us that opportunity. I’m looking forward to a round of golf with Obama or Hillary down there.”

Named in honor of the Trident nuclear missile, Trident Lakes, originally designed for surviving a nuclear war, has since matured into the go-to place for wealthy Nibiru preparation enthusiasts.

Trident Lakes CEO Jim O’conner told the Houston chronicle that Trident Lakes will provide residents with a luxurious life beneath the Earth. According to O’Conner, Trident Lakes will have 400 condominiums capable of sheltering 1600 people for up to five years. “This will be the best place to survive Nibiru,” he said.

He expects completion by 2018, if Nibiru doesn’t strike first.

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Former USGS Climatologist Dr. Ethan Trowbridge says that Nibiru is responsible for the massive earthquake and subsequent tsunami that struck New Zealand just after midnight. The 7.8 magnitude earthquake caused widespread damage, forcing thousands of frightened residents, including small children, to flee their homes for higher ground as emergency services warned of destructive waves of up to 50 meters in some areas.

Earlier this year, Dr. Trowbridge broke ranks with the USGS to warn the world about the forthcoming Nibiru cataclysm. He stated that the USGS has colluded with the White House and foreign powers to conceal Nibiru’s existence until the last possible moment.  A week before Hurricane Matthew devastated parts of Florida and North Carolina, Dr. Trowbridge accurately predicted that Nibiru’s influence would cause the storm to strengthen, spin counter-clockwise, and strike the southeast United States, not spin harmlessly out to see as other forecasts at that time had predicted.

“This is a terrible time for life on Earth,” said Dr. Trowbridge. “Nibiru is nearing our inner solar system, and with each passing day it more and more threatens our existence. I’ve tried to warn people, dammit, I’ve tried to warn people, but they just won’t listen. As soon as I heard about the earthquake, I made some phone calls and begged that a tsunami warning be issued. I knew the loss of life might be catastrophic if people didn’t seek higher ground. This is a terrible, terrible thing to happen. Like I’ve said, this is Nibiru season.”

At this early hour, the full extent of damage has yet to be ascertained.  The US Geological survey has not ruled out additional tsunamis affecting coastal regions. Sonar buoys—used to detect size and strength of ocean movement—in the South Pacific indicate that another gigantic wall of water might soon strike the North Canterbury region of New Zealand’s South Island.

Following the quake, New Zealand’s emergency services dispatched helicopters, medical personal, and specially trained big dogs to search for survivors near the quake’s epicenter, northeast of Christchurch, where in 2011 a magnitude 6.3 quake killed 23,000 people. Although there were no immediate reports of Death, Dr. Trowbridge asserts the potential for catastrophic loss of life.

“I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that this quake and wave killed hundreds of thousands,” Dr. Trowbridge said. “The governments are always wary of releasing these figures—they don’t wan’t to scare people. And, historically speaking, they lie about causalities. We know, for example, that on that fateful day in New York City, many more than 3,000 people died. According to my sources, as many as 26,000 may have perished, but the government and the 911 commission have hidden that fact. I wouldn’t be surprised if something like that happens in New Zealand, today.”

Eyewitness testimony bolsters his assertions. A woman living in Takana, New Zealand, at the top of South Island, said she saw bodies floating in the water after the first wave came ashore.  Usually reliable sources phoned in a report about “many bodies” buried beneath the rubble of a collapsed building in the coastal tourist town of Kaikoura.

“New Zealand must prepare for the worse,” said Dr. Trowbridge. “It’s been long established that Nibiru will be first felt in the Southern Hemisphere, and this seems to have been proven correct. Given Nibiru’s proximity and position to Earth, events like this will increase tenfold in the coming months. The world, as we knew it, has changed. Nibiru is here.”

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Nibiru favored Donald J. Trump, says Jaelle Jafranka, a Romanian gypsy currently living in Mayfield, New York. Jafranka has spent thirty years studying Nibiru’s influence on persons’ actions and behaviors. A self-taught astrologer, numerologist, and nibiruologist, she has recently added the time-honored skill of phrenology to her comprehensive repertoire of divining techniques. By studying the shape and curvature of a person’s head, Jafranka harvests celestial energies, giving her insight into the past, present, and future.

“Donald Trump is very great man,” Ms. Jafranka said. “He has very large head. Nice shape. Like bowling ball. His head has many bumps. Many months ago, I tried to meet Mr. Trump, to offer him a personal reading, but was turned away.”

In September, Jafranka traveled to Trump Tower hoping to meet the wealthy Republican nominee, but Trump’s security and secret service detail escorted her from the Manhattan skyscraper before she neared the business mogul’s private offices. Regardless, Ms. Jafranka holds no malice toward Trump’s exemplary security detail and believes that Trump will accomplish magnificent feats.

“I understand they were just doing their job,” she said. “I wanted to bless the future president and read his head. I sprayed the lobby with sacred Gypsy oils. This made them think I wanted to poison Mr. Trump. I wish him good tidings. He needs to know Nibiru favored him, and helped him win the election. I have seen many photographs of President-elect Trump. He has a large almond-shaped bump on the upper left side of his head. That is Nibiru.”

Nibiru, she says, was rising, in conjunction with Jupiter and Saturn on June 16th, 2015, the day Trump announced his candidacy. Nibiru’s entrancing radiance guaranteed that Trump would vanquish his Republican foes and move forward to conquer his utmost rival, Hillary Clinton.

“Hillary is not good,” Ms. Jafranka said. “Nibiru was in declination when nasty Hillary Clinton entered the race. Mr. Trump’s ascension was certain from the very first day.”

Despite her love for all things Trump, Ms. Jafranka expressed concerns over Trump’s stance on immigration reform; an undocumented citizen, she fears that Gypsies might be lumped together with Muslims, Mexicans, Canadians, and radical Islamic terrorists—and face immediate deportation.

“Many Gypsies fear being deported,” she said. “We come to America for better life. Dumpsters have much better food in America than in Romania. We aspire to great things here. Like Mr. Trump, we want to live in a palace in the sky. He is close to God.”

Ms. Jafranka plans to petition for American citizenship, and, if successful, apply for one of the 4000 jobs currently being filled by Trump’s presidential transition team. “Every president needs an advisor with alternative skills like astrology,” she said. “Ronald had Nancy. Trump will have me.”

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